IRS

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Excuses, Excuses

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So-called "tax protestors" have dreamed up dozens of excuses for not paying the taxes the rest of us grumble about. They argue that the Sixteenth Amendment, which authorizes the government to levy an income tax without apportionment among the states, was never "properly ratified." They accuse the "alleged" Internal Revenue Service of being a massive premeditated conspiracy to defraud U.S. citizens. Some groups assert that the gold tassels around the American flags that stand in many federal courts are a "mutilation," rendering them "courts of admiralty" with no proper jurisdiction. Still others contend that taxpayers aren't required to file a federal tax return because the instructions associated with Form 1040 don't display an OMB control number as required by the Paperwork Reduction Act. (Can you imagine risking jail time on an argumen t like that?)

Well, the IRS has heard it all. They've published a web page identifying 40 Frivolous Positions for Taxpayers to Avoid. They've warned taxpayers about a $5,000 penalty for using any of these arguments

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Resolutions We'd Like to See

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2014 is here, and it's time for New Years' resolutions. Americans across the country are pledging to lose weight, quit smoking, exercise, and find new jobs. Some of them will succeed, others will lose faith before the first snowmelt. (Want to make a fortune? Open a gym that turns into a sports bar on February 1!) So we thought we would take this opportunity to suggest some resolutions to the folks who determine how much tax we pay.

Congress: Put the Tax Code on a diet. According to one count, our tax code runs nearly 4 million words. That's four times the words in all the Harry Potter books put together, with none of the magic and wizardry. (You may think we work a version of the "obliteration charm" when we save you thousands in tax, but we assure you there's nothing supernatural involved.) We say it's high time to put the Tax Code on a diet —

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That's a Lot of Gravy!

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Back in 1621, a group of hardy Pilgrims sat down for a three-day festival of thanksgiving to celebrate surviving plague, starvation, cold, scurvy, Indian attack, and all the other obstacles that made life in the "new world" so delightful. They feasted on game birds, flint corn, venison, eels, shellfish, and native vegetables including beans, turnips, carrots, onions, and pumpkins. (No butter or flour, though, which meant no pumpkin pie. And aren't you glad we remember them now for turkey instead of eels?)

242 years later, President Abraham Lincoln proclaimed the first "official" Thanksgiving — a national day of "Thanksgiving and Praise to our benificent Father who dwelleth in the Heavens." Since then, it's become one of America's favorite holidays, a four-day weekend of friends and family without the Christmas-season hype.

You know who else loves Thanksgiving? Our friends at the IRS, of course. That's because they get to stuff themselves with taxes on everything connected with our celebration!

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What's in a Name?

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In Shakespeare's most recognized tragedy, the star-crossed lover Juliet asks "What's in a name? That which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet." Now, that may have been true back in Juliet's day. But is it still true now in today's era of celebrity branding?

Here's the deal. Back in 2009, executors for the King of Pop, Michael Jackson, filed an estate tax return reporting the value of his assets at his death. Jackson had been famously extravagant during his life, blowing through hundreds of millions in earnings and borrowing hundreds of millions more. His 2,600-acre "Neverland" ranch in Santa Barbara that included two railroads, a petting zoo, and a Ferris wheel reportedly cost $2.5 million per month to maintain. He spent millions more on travel, entertainment, antiques, and paintings. And feeding "Bubbles," his pet chimpanzee, couldn't have been cheap, either.

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Touchdown, IRS?

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It's Week Nine of the 2013 football season, and millions of Americans are following every play. The Kansas City Chiefs are still undefeated. The New York Giants have finally won a couple of games. And playoff races are already starting to take shape. (Bengals, anyone?) So, what does any of this have to do with taxes?

Today's National Football League is the biggest spectacle since the Romans packed the Coliseum to watch the Christians take on the Lions. (Needless to say, the Lions were heavy favorites — and usually covered the spread.) Last year, the league generated $9.5 billion in revenue from a combination of TV rights, ticket sales, stadium concessions, and licensing agreements. The biggest part of that cash geyser goes to the players (who naturally pay tax on their salaries). More chunks go to the owners (who pay tax on theirs), and stadium vendors (who pay tax on all those eight-dollar beers).

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Horsing Around with Tax Preparers

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This is a big week for taxes and technology. State "insurance exchanges" are scheduled to open for business under the Affordable Care Act, which lets consumers sign up for tax-subsidized individual health insurance. The White House has already announced that technological glitches will delay online enrollment on the small business ("SHOP") and Spanish-language sites. That's a decidedly 21st-century, "first world" problem. So, why on earth is the IRS lassoing an 1884 law dealing with lost Civil War horses to regulate tax preparers?

Right now, there are no industry-wide rules governing tax preparers. So, back in 2011, the IRS announced their new "Return Preparer Initiative," which required preparers to register with the IRS, pass a competency test, and take continuing education classes. The new rules apply to any tax preparer who isn't already regulated as an attorney, Certified Public Accountant (CPA), or Enrolled Agent (EA).